To celebrate the end of the year, and the beginning of a new one, I am going to be resharing my favourite posts from the past twelve months! Also from December 2020, and written after a very moving email conversation with a customer, here’s a post about healthy boundaries, personal growth, and generational trauma:
One of the subjects that I deal with again and again with customers, especially my generation and older, is the difference between being selfish and doing what is better for yourself.
We come from great generational trauma, and we were taught by traumatized people. They taught that putting yourself in the position of a martyr, and not having any sort of healthy boundaries, was THE way to be a decent human being.
Just so, anything that meant keeping boundaries with toxic people and relationships, and doing only what is convenient for your growth and happiness, was to be seen as selfishness, vanity, and separation from the family/society/environment.
And while more often than not there was no ill will in that teaching, just the result of what those people had learnt themselves, we must work very hard to break that chain, for ourselves, and for all future generations. We just cannot carry this anymore, and we cannot burden our children with this trauma anymore.
And yes, we will feel selfish while doing it, because we are going to be breaking great taboos that are completely ingrained in our behaviour; and yes, we will have to carry guilt, and doubt, and pain; but the gift we will be making to the next generations is simply invaluable.
When we teach a new generation to live without guilt of empowering themselves, we cannot even imagine the rewards it will bring to them. Think for a moment where would you be if that had not been taught to you – can you imagine what kind of things you would have achieved, and even more important, what kind of relationships and conflicts would have NOT happened?
I have no doubt that, when I face these issues with my customers, whether if it’s through readings or through spellwork, both their Ancestors and my Ancestors are behind it, rooting for their happiness and success. They have been behind the design of every single group ritual I’ve made this year, and they have brought me back the most joyful moments of the year, as customers share with me their success stories. In such a troubling year as this one, it has truly kept me going.
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Carolina Gonzalez - Your Spirit Master 